Self introspection

Updated on October 13th, 2022

How I got motivated for 10 days Vipassana Retreat

I was very inquisitive about Meditation. I could really never understand as to how sitting quiet in isolation could solve anyone’s problems. I heard about Vipassana, a meditation technique from a friend of mine, who had undergone a 10 days Vipassana retreat at one of the centres in India. When I enquired about it on the net, I gathered that for Vipassana, you have to register in advance at any one of centres in various parts of the world. Once you join, you cannot leave it midway and would have to remain in captivity for ten days till completion. You will be totally cut off from the world, will be required to maintain a total silence and live more or less like a monk. The daily routine would include only meditation and meditation and you will be sitting in a cross legged position for nearly 10 to 12 hours everyday.

It sounded very difficult but  when I researched on the benefits of Vipassana, I got a very positive feedback from the people who had done it. So after a lot of contemplation, I made up my mind to undergo this 10 days of prison.  I was expecting the Vipassana centre  to be like a monastery with only bare minimum of everything just to survive. However, I found the facilities to be better than I had anticipated, considering that they were free of charge. At the end of the course, if you wish, you may make donation for the centre to run future courses. After initial formalities, we  were briefed on strict code of  conduct and adherence to  five precepts: no killing, no stealing, no lying, no sexual misconduct and no intoxicants. That was the last time we were permitted to speak, as soon thereafter, we went into ‘Noble Silence’ for next 10 days.

Daily Schedule during Vipassana

4:00am  Morning wake-up bell   

4:30-6:30am  Meditation

6:30-8:00am  Breakfast break   

8:00-9:00am  Group meditation

9:00-11:00am  Meditation

11:00-12:00pm  Lunch break   

12:00-1:00pm  Rest and interviews w/ teacher   

1:00-2:30pm  Meditation

2:30-3:30pm  Group meditation

3:30-5:00pm  Meditation

5:00-6:00pm  Fruit and tea break (construed as dinner)

6:00-7:00pm  Group meditation

7:00-8:15pm  Discourse

8:15-9:00pm  Meditation

9:00-9:30pm  Question time

9:30pm  Retire to your room–lights out

Staying motionless in cross legged position became my biggest challenge

Our first session started at 4:30 am next day which involved sitting steady in cross legged position and simply observing our breath. Not being use to sitting on the floor, I could barely manage to sit in that position for about 20 minutes.  My legs started paining. After about 45 minutes, my back started paining. I took frequent breaks in guise of using the washroom. But there were three sessions of one hour each, everyday called as ‘Adhishtan’ where were expected to freeze in one position without any movement. It reminded me of ‘statue’ game we used play as children. I realised that despite my best efforts, my movement and frequent changing of legs continued. We were not supposed to open our eyes while meditating, but I could not resist opening my eyes momentarily to see how others were coping up.  My first day ended somehow. I had intense pain in my legs and back. Most of the time, rather than concentrating on meditation, I was mostly fighting a battle with myself on how to sit straight and steady.

‘Anapana’ Meditation as prelude to Vipassana

Every subsequent day became difficult in terms of sitting motionless in cross-legged position. For the first three days, our task was to observe our breathing and feel your breath going in and coming out and feel the sensation in the front part of the nostrils, known as Anapana meditation. I tried to focus my attention on my breath, but  my mind wandered all over with all types of thoughts.

Vipassana Meditation

On the third day itself, we were given ‘Vipassana’. In Vipassana, now we were to take our mind to all parts of the body, in a sequence starting from head, going down till tow and back from tow to head again in a very gradual manner. The concept was to take your attention to a small part of your body, feel the sensation in that part and then move your attention on to next part. In this process, you cover the entire body from head to tow. The sensation may of any kind: vibration, shivering, burning, throbbing, pulsating or in any other form.

Sense of Relief and Achievement on the final day

With every passing day, while my pain in the knees, legs and back increased and fourth day, I had a feeling of calling it off. But my ego and resolve and fear of being termed as a loser kept me going. After nearly fifth day, I was able to stay motionless for nearly 30 min without pain, at a time. My concentration had also started to  improve and I started experiencing bouts of quiet moments when my mind remained in check and did not wander. I started feeling myself in the present moment. By the ninth day, I was able to sit totally motionless for one hour and I felt as I had climbed Mount Everest. The worst being over, I  experienced  Vipassana for the first time. I could feel the free flow of sensation from my head to tow. On the last day, we broke our silence and could say hello to others and share experience with them. Felt that the effort was worth it and I would strongly recommend 10 days Vipassana retreat to  all who want to achieve peace of mind.

Concept of Vipassana

Our mind is in a habit of wandering. It either wanders in the evnents of the past or in expectations for the future. By observing the body sensations as they arise and pass, without becoming caught up in them, we make an effort to remain in the present. Vipassana  is based on the concept that your unconscious mind is strongly inter-connected with you body and is inseparable from it. Your body is always experiencing sensations. These sensations may be pleasant, causing craving for more or unpleasant causing aversion to them. Over a period these cravings and aversions results in creation of ‘Sankaras’. This  become a habit which leads to multiplication of ‘sankaras’ over a period of time. These ‘Sankarsa’  accumulate and get embedded into your unconcious mind leading to misery. These deep-rooted ‘Sakaras’ from unconscious mind control your emotions and behaviour. Your conscious mind has no control over them. Vipassana helps you to work with the deepest level of the unconscious mind.

When you sit quiet and start observing sensations in your body, these ‘Sankaras’ surface from your deep-rooted unconscious mind and appear in the form of  sensation in your body. Observing theses sensations objectively with an open mind and accepting them as non-permanent, results in these accumulated ‘Sanskaras’ to weaken and fade away gradually from your unconcious mind. So over a period, old cravings and aversions fade away and by not allowing any new cravings and aversions to be formed, your mind becomes pure. You get freedom from your deep-seated causes of suffering.

Benefits of Vipassana

• My capacity to work has significantly increased. I don’t get tired as I used to, before I started doing Vipassana.

• My requirement of sleep has reduced. I do not feel tired even if I sleep less.

• I used to be very restless and short tempered. With Vipassana, I became calm and could exercise a fairly good control over my anger.

• I am able to fall asleep within 20 minutes of hitting the bed.

• My blood pressure used to be on the higher side. It became normal.

• I frequently used to feel stressed under pressure of work, but Vipassana has helped me improve my focus and ability to work under stress.

• I had difficulty in maintaining good inter-personal relationships. My inter-personal relationship improved with all.

• I have found an improvement in my mood and feeling of general well being.

• Whenever I feel tired or emotionally disturbed, I take a break and do Vipassana for 15 to 20 minutes. It always refreshes me and makes me feel better.

For anyone who has an inclination for meditation, I would recommend Vipassana as a comprehensive and a practical form of Meditation.